


Heart's Wish

by Liniel



Series: The Norrath Saga [3]
Category: EverQuest
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-21
Updated: 2019-07-21
Packaged: 2020-07-10 02:45:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,824
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19898581
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Liniel/pseuds/Liniel
Summary: Dark elf siblings Xanissa and Ziran come to a turning point in their lives, the night their father dies. Will Freeport offer them a refuge and a way to find what their hearts desire?





	1. Chapter 1

_She never watched the morning rising_   
_Too busy with the day’s first chores_   
_But oft she would watch the sun's fading_   
_As the cold of night swept across the moors_   
_And in that moment she felt the loss_   
_Of everything that had been missed_   
_So used to feeling the spirit sink_   
_She had not felt her own heart's wish_

_J.R.R. Tolkien_

Xanissa threw herself on the bed, pulling the pillow over her head to shut out the drunken voice from downstairs. Her left eye was already swollen shut and throbbing with pain. Hot tears of anger and frustration spilled down her cheeks. Her father had only been home for a few days and already he had ruined everything she and her brother Ziran had worked so hard for during the months their father was lost to the world. He’d always been a heavy drinker and a gambler, and when Xanissa’s mother died it had gotten worse. He’d disappear for weeks at a time, to the gods know where. This time he’d returned with a bounty hunter on his heels, deep in dept.

_Ailith._

Xan's thoughts lingered on their short and unexpected romance. It had ended with a quarrel, and from that point Xan's life had taken a turn for the worse. _Not that it was that good to begin with,_ she thought bitterly. _The gods forgive me, I wish father had never returned._ Her and Ziran had managed the farm while he was gone, doing their best to maintain some sort of family life. Early on in life, she had given up her own dreams of learning magic to stay at home and take care of their home and her brother. Besides, magic was forbidden on the small isle where their family – along with other refugees from Neriak – had settled down. When early on in life she had realized she was gifted, she’d hidden it well and never practiced her magic save for the occasional lonely night in her room, when the temptation was too strong to resist.

“You’re not comin’ out ‘til you listen to reason!” It was her father’s voice, yelling from downstairs. She rolled over to the side, hugging the pillow tightly, her petite body shaking with sobs. _Reason. HE was the unreasonable one._

She must have drifted off to sleep eventually for when there was a gentle tap at the door, it was already dark outside. The side of her face was tender to the touch, and with a grimace of pain she sat up in her bed, her voice hoarse from crying. “Go away.” The door was pushed open and Ziran peeked his head into the room. “It’s just me. Can I come in?” Without waiting for a reply, he quickly stepped into the room, shutting the door behind him. “Don’t worry, love. He’s passed out on the kitchen floor.” A few more steps and he was there by her bed, taking her in his arms. Again, her tears burst forth, mingled with blood from the wounded eye, staining her brother’s shirt. He let her cry, gently caressing her face and silky hair as she sobbed against his chest. “Shhh... It will all be okay, I promise. He’ll never hurt you again.” 

He held her while she cried, bitter tears burning her skin as they fell. After a while she pulled herself together, wiping her face with her sleeve. She froze, staring at the blood-smeared fabric. _Too much blood._ Her belly tightened in a knot as her gaze slowly wandered to Ziran’s blood-coated hands, lingering there for what seemed like an eternity. “Ziran?” She breathed his name, fear making her throat tight. She raised her gaze to look into azure eyes, so much like her own, seeing the love - and then the hurt - in them as she scrambled out of bed and backed away from him. “ZIran, gods, what have you done...?”

“Xan please... Listen, just hear me out. There’s a ship leaving tonight, a merchant vessel bound for the Overlord’s Outpost... ” He stood, wetting his dry lips, starting to move towards her.

She shook her head in disbelief, trying wrap her mind around it all. “What? You’re --- you’re leaving?”

“No... No..! YOU are." He took her cold hands into his own, pleading with her. "You deserve a better life, away from all this...” He glanced around the room in disgust. “… This poverty. This prison. You have a chance to get out of here. You could go to Freeport. You are destined for something far greater---”

But she stopped him there, shaking her head, the saddest smile on her lips. “No… No, I can’t. You know that. It would cost a fortune, and father...” She paused now, looking to the door as she listened to the silence.

Ziran cupped her chin gently, turning her head and her focus back towards him. “Listen. I’ve saved some money. It’s not much but it will get you a safe passage to Freeport and it will be enough for a few months of tutoring at the academy.” He shook his head at her when she opened her mouth to speak. “No, listen. Father was wrong in denying you this, you know it. It will all be okay, I promise. I’ll leave this place, enlist in the militia, whatever it takes. And when we’re safe, I’ll come find you. Xanissa?”

She was staring at him in shock, a blank expression on her face. She felt so numb, unreal; as someone else was standing in this room and she herself was watching them from above. “Is he dead?” Her voice sounded hollow even to her own hears. Ziran grabbed her by the shoulders, shaking her gently. “Hey, snap out of it, please, there is no time. Here, take this.” He let go of her, reaching for his coin purse. Weighing it in his hand, he looked around for her backpack. He found it tossed under her bed and kneeling to reach it he packed the purse into the bag, glancing at his sister with a worried look on his face.

Finally she moved, mechanically, as if someone else was controlling her movements. “I have to get changed.” Her voice sounded flat, emotionless, dead; her hands trembling as she opened the lid to a chest. From it, she took out a blue robe and a black leather cord to tie around her waist. She remained standing with the items in her hands, staring into thin air.

Ziran brought her the backpack. “Hurry up, or you’ll miss the ship!!” Impatiently, he snatched the robe from her hands and stuffed it into the backpack. “But I need my things...” Xan stared down at the contents of the chest, a little color returning to her pale cheeks. “The totem, and my amulet...” She started tossing things into her backpack hastily, suddenly anxious to leave. Ziran gave a sad smile, but it didn't reach his eyes. “You’ve always did like to collect odd things - but that’s enough. Let’s go”. Hand in hand they snuck down the stairs and hurried past the kitchen where their father lay on the floor in a pool of blood, and slunk off into the night.


	2. Leavetaking

Two pair of eyes, brightly blue like azure skies, followed the dock hand as he walked up the gangplank of the merchant vessel bound for Freeport, carrying a large crate of goods. Hers, the skin around them still swollen and bruised, remained fixed on the ship. She chewed at her lower lip absently, shifting her gaze towards the sea, waves gently rocking the boat. “I cannot do this, Ziran.”

Her brother watched her face, his gaze lingering briefly on her mouth. He slipped an arm around her shoulders, giving her a comforting hug. “Of course you can. You’ve done this a hundred times before, unseen, when stealing apples from old mrs Treglan.”

“Yeah, that’s not what I meant.” Finally she turned her head to look into his eyes, gently touching his face. “Not the invisibility spell. I meant leaving… Our home, our family.” She seated herself on a crate with a sigh. Ziran squatted down next to her, looking up at her face in silence and when at last he spoke, his voice sounded tight and bitter. “It is better this way. You leaving. There is nothing for you here.” He broke eye contact, glancing over at the commotion up the street. People were gathering, and he could hear upset voices.

Xanissa pulled her eyebrows together. “But how can you say that? Ziran, look at me.” She cupped his face in her palms, forcing his gaze back to her. “My home is here. YOU are here. Everything that we’ve shared, everything we’ve been through and fought for while father was gone – does it mean nothing to you?” Ziran grabbed her writs and inhaled sharply, as if the words had pierced his heart. She caught a glimpse of frustration and pain crossing his face as he arose quickly, pulling her up with him. He brought her right hand to his lips, kissing the palm softly before he abruptly pushed her away. “It means everything to me. That’s why you have to leave. Now.” He ran a hand across his brow, taking a step back from her.

“Um, Ziran?” She shivered in the early morning chill, reaching out for him, confusion written on her face. He stared at her outstretched hand now as if it were a thing of evil, then shook his head. “Go." He nodded towards the people shouting further up the street. "Go, while people are still gawking at whatever is going on over there." He turned away from her now and his voice came out a strangled whisper. "Just go. While I am still able to let you."

Xan took a step back, and his words and actions starting to sink in. She did so not want to know this. Her stomach tightened in a knot, her heart pounding; she tossed a quick glance over at the crowd of people gathering around some woman, then shifted her gaze back to Ziran, wetting her dry lips nervously. "Please, Ziran, don't leave me! Not like this…"

But he growled now, lashing out at her. “Go! Leave, now, before it is too late! GO!” Pain twisted his face as he turned his back on her and started walking towards the commotion.

"Ziran!" She saw him tense as she yelled is name, but he kept on walking. Xan had but moments now to make her choice. She cast another glance towards the ship then snapped it back to Ziran. If she followed him now, everything would be over and they would both have to pay for her choice and for his actions; yet watching him leave shattered her heart. _They would hang him for murdering their father._

“May the Gods watch over you, little brother.” She spun around and hurried towards the boat, weaving the invisibility spell as she went.


End file.
